At the moment I’m reading the book by Ekhart Tolle – Power of Now. While reading I have my growing sprout laying on my chest taking his nap. He has been sleeping on my chest since he was born. But now he has started to scoot himself off to the side so that he can fit right & still hear my heart.
I’m in the early beginning of the book & already feeling a little anxious as the pages goes. Having this beautiful baby on my chest & living in the now is amazing. But at times I’m in the epiphany of how the now quickly passes into a memory, which makes me want to stop time.
I’m soo fortunate to be a stay home mom. Off course I have times when it feels very challenging being a mom & spending most days around the baby with almost no social interaction other than my Instagram app – until papa comes home in the evening.
But having this precious baby on my chest, sleeping to the sound of my heart makes me want to freeze the now & not be reminded how it quickly turns into a past.
Eckhart Tolle is amazing but maybe I’m not ready for him yet….
The other day I posted a mini comment about how I like to cuddle my kneecaps while doing the seated sequences in Ashtanga. A secret that I thought I was lonely about – and at times I thought I might be a little strange doing it as I never heard or see anyone else doing it. At times I do know that I totally take my body for granted. And should be more grateful for it taking care if me as much as it does.
….Pringles, M&M craves, Coffee Bean runs does take a toll on it…. And I cannot imagine how much it had to work while I was smoking & drinking alcohol.
However, thinking I was lonely in this bodily gratefulness was wrong. There where other beautiful yogis who admitted they do the same thing in their practice, which made me really happy. I’m so thankful to have found this amazing community of yogis & friends through the simple app of Instagram! Without it I wonder if I would ever have found out that other people cuddle their kneecaps & thank their bodies like I do.
Sending you love & light on this beautiful Friday! Now I’m off to thank my temple & kneecaps again!
Today the book Power of Now got downloaded on my iPhone. I was actually inspired by the blog post written by Yoga Girl (@yoga_girl) who had the book as one of her favorite books. I have heard about Eckhart Tolle for a while but never got myself to read any of his books. But I guess today was the day the universe made me ready for him.
It’s going to be interesting to see if my mind & mental outlook will change after reading this book. Did you change your perspective of life & mind set after reading his books?
I was privileged of being able to become a mother during my lifetime and just by the day I see how my little boy is growing & developing into a personality of his own. How a clean slate of human being starts to develop feelings from the survival mode of primal instincts to waking up with a glowing smile to crying for comfort & love.
However, at times I get eye openers – from living my very coveted life in my tiki hut with my beautify husband & baby boy, doing yoga, reading Dalai Lama teachings & talking walks around one of the most beautiful places on earth Diamond Head to seeing terrible events happening in the news, getting doors shut in the face at the grocery store to people cutting in front of you in line. Those eye openers makes you both sad & shocked that there is another life outside of the coveted tiki hut life of love, care & family.
And it shockss me how we from being born with a purity of life become egotistical, hurtful & selfish. What makes us change so abruptly from the purity of life to loosing ourselves in adulthood?….Being a mother makes me wonder what life changes creates selfishness, hate & non-compassion.
For this past week I have gone & yogad twice. It has been challenging to know what class to take as I am Ashtanga addicted. And not all classes are Ashtanga based here on the island (even if I wished they where).
Instead I have had to take a mixture of other classes, which has been good but frustrating at times. The frustration has been when the teacher focus a lot of attention on creating a joined flow but forget that you are using the same body part throughout the sequence without giving it a break. An example would be that you do a warrior one. Secondly you go in to a humble warrior & third you go into Utthita Parsvakonasana A into locking your arms & jumping yourself forward into a birds of paradise. Just the whole sequence puts soo much pressure on one leg. So once you are in birds of paradise you are exhausted & your leg is all blood & energy deprived. And within all these asanas you don’t energize yourself with a vinyasa….during this time – my mind will get irritated & I shoot stink eyes left & right to my new teacher. It frustrates me & I loose slight interest in wanting to come back to class.
But in between all the stink eye flows the teacher includes balancing poses of handstands, crows & tortoise poses, which makes the stink eye turn into a smiling one. And out I walk as a happy yogi camper.
Mama has got herself a schedule!! Since we don’t have family around to help watch our baby, I have had to watch our high need baby boy 24/7. I don’t mind it at all but I mentally have needed my own time. The only quick fix for my own time is to put me on a yoga mat for a rigid workout for 1 hour & 1/2. After you have let me sweat, push & dig all my mental, physical & spiritual emotions out – you will find a very happy & content Rita.
I call yoga my medicine & my husband will nod in agreement if you ever would ask him if it’s true.
So we have finally been able to get our little boy more connected with papa so that I can go & join my yoga class (x4 times a week!!).
And it is soo true with what they say – happy mama = happy baby!
In just an hour I get to go & do my Ashtanga practice. One minute I’m thinking it’s going to be soo rejuvenating to sweat myself through all the asanas. The next minute I’m thinking that maybe Im too sore from my Saturday practice….(it’s Tuesday). And the following minute I’m back on my yoga high.
Does your mind play tricks on you when you are waiting to go & do your practice? I wish I could just switch channel at times like we do on TV – where I would stop thinking about all the hundred excuses my mind will come up with before I finally put my shoes on & grab my mat.
I know that once I am in class I will feel so good & tell myself that I need to go & practice on a daily basis.
However, once I’m back home & take off those shoes my mind is back in “couch” mode. It’s a good thing I started blogging…just writing this made me have a yoga high for a few minutes.
Now I just got 40 minutes to go…let’s see how many highs & lows of excuses my mind will come up with before I can head out…
Yoga is amazing. I don’t know if you can feel the connectedness in any other sport or activity as you can with yoga. Yesterdays Ashtanga practice was a mess! I have had a rough few days with my little one & I hadn’t been on the mat for 5 days….and it felt like my messy energy & practice filled up the whole room.
Everything from downward dog to navasana to locust pose became uncoordinated, stiff & incooperable. My zen was gone in my headstand & my energy was depleted in just a few minutes from the start of my practice.
Maybe it’s not only from a rough few days with a fussy baby but also a wash of hormonal changes that have happened. My hair is falling out like never before, the food has lost its flavor & my skin has lost its luster….but I guess not every day can be a good day & on the bright side…tomorrow’s practice can only get better!