Ache & Anxieties for Tomorrow.

So for the past week & a half I have had terrible stomach ache mainly after I have had a meal. And researcher as I am I rather go and visit the google.com page than go to the doctor. So I have diagnosed myself to have everything from gallbladder disorder to peptic ulcers to bacteria to maybe even having stomach pains that are candida related……

Yesterday I finally got myself to the doctor. And today I am off to take some blood tests. After I came home yesterday it dawned on me that I might not be able to breastfeed if I have this bacteria, or how would I do with the milk if I have to do a surgery?!? All these worries, questions and anxiety started to build up….and my stomach started to hurt even more. Tears started to roll down while I was looking at my little baby boy drinking the magic milk. I love our bonding we have when I get to nurse my little miracle & I don’t want to have to start giving him the McDonalds formula as I call it.

While I am writing all of this, I realize that I need to take a step backwards. As a yogi wanting to live & preach to live in the moment  – I shouldn’t let the anxiety get to me. Fear & anxiety preaches on bad energy for something that has not happened. Instead I need to take a deep breathe and live in today with my little baby boy as you never ever will know what tomorrow will bring.

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Doing the Pigeon Pose & don’t really know where my gaze should be in this pose:)

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